Sunday, 14 December 2008

It really IS the end of a nightmare!

It seems that whenever I write for my blog the posts tend be on the negative side. I fear I’m a lot more cynical in my old age and seemingly ordinary things really fucking irritate me. I could post everyday about something that either upset me or I think ‘someone did something really stupid today’ sort of thing, but that would give people the wrong impression of me. Despite the world going to hell I am still a positive person who thinks there are a lot of good things going on, though I can’t actually think of anything at the moment! But such moments do come along and usually when least expected. A smile from a passing stranger will lift my heart and wipe away a recent disappointment or a negative thought in an instant, simple in its execution but powerfully meaningful and really makes me glad to be alive. Only the other week we had a bad overnight frost and our car needed de-icing. I had bought a couple of cans of the stuff from Halfords, and I had nearly finished on our car and I noticed that one of the residents in the block of flats nearby was struggling with a scraper to get rid of the ice on his car. I had no hesitation to go over there and give him a few squirts just to speed up the process for him. I had no idea who he was, it didn’t enter my head that he might be the worst person on earth, (a purely non-judgmental act that my counselling course tutor would be proud of me!) I think that’s the sort of thing people should do, and I think the guy was probably surprised at first, but I like to think that he thought that not everybody thinks only of themselves. Hopefully he will go away from the experience thinking the same.
Getting back to the original concept for this post, I got a letter yesterday from the Open University that I have passed the Biological Psychology course that I struggled with for most of the year (see previous post 'End of a Nightmare'). Not only did I pass but my average was above what I predicted it would be. I don’t know how and I don’t fucking care! I will never have to study the brain, and I won’t have to cross paths with that tutor anymore! I had been carrying the thought with me that I had failed this course and I would have to either resit one of the assignments or even do the course again. This would mean, of course, that I would have to wait another year before I gained my degree. Now that I have passed I can concentrate on my final course, Social Psychology, knowing that at the end of it I will have reached my goal of getting the degree that I started to study for way back in 1996! I did take 8 year break, just in case some of you think it takes this fucking long to complete a degree with the OU!
So, I can see the light at the end of the tunnel at last. The letter came when I wasn’t even expecting it to be my result. I thought it was something to do with my financial account concerning my next course. Another moment to lift my heart when I least expected it?

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